The NOT SO HAPPY Ramblings...& Craft Pictures
What a terrible spring we have been having...as you know I have had my sewing machine out and I was supposed to be listing items that I have made on my website...but what with one thing and another! (lack of sunlight I think!) I just can't be bothered! terrible isn't it!
Anyway...this week I have been over at my Mums house, I haven't seen her since Christmas...I really felt like we had got a lot closer after last year and her fall and everything, what with the weekly visits to her house and trips to the hospital to visit her and stuff...and then! like a bombshell she goes and writes something awful about me to a relation...which really upset me no end! so I just couldn't bring myself to go and see her! two steps forward, three steps back!
I felt like I needed time to heal, before I could see her again and then she asked me if I could accompany her on another hospital trip and at first i said no...but then I felt guilty! why do Mother's make you feel like that!...so I rang her and said that I would go with her!
We had a nice time together and I never mentioned anything about how I felt, because i didn't want an argument with her!...She is precious to me, as i know lots of you no longer have your Mother's and I understand that I am a lucky soul in that respect, but she does so break my heart at times...but I have learned to live with her being like she is over the years...
She is a very strong woman, because she has had to live with her hip disability all her life, but she has never really taken me seriously and has never ever stuck up for me...always taking who ever I am in disagreements with side...which I have always felt very upset about! but over the years I have become hardened to her ways and tried my best to get on with her...I suppose you could say I am more like my Father...but he passed away 26 years ago now....gosh I soooo miss him!
Anyway...I don't know why I am telling you this now! It seems so silly, but what with the lack of sunshine and my moping...its been hard to get on track this year...after 7 years of blogging it is sometimes hard to know what to blog about and I have never really let you know about the nitty gritty of my personal life...but i kind of feel that every now and again...you need to know, where i am at!..lol!
So I have been over at my Mum's for a few days and although I never told her how I have been feeling...I now feel that I am over it! and I can move on...Life can be so tough at times...even when you have a name like Happy!...sometimes I think I should change my name as i seemed to of had a run of bad luck and SH*T come my way lately...so don't think it is just you! I have had my fair share over the years, believe, you, me! Eek!
It doesn't help either that I am now in MENOPAUSE...Yep! no more Peri-menopause for me! My periods are off the agenda now! and i now have all the other rotten symptoms that come's with being Middle-aged! Itchy all over, feeling Hot Hot Hot! Memory Loss....middle-aged spread and everything that was once 'PERT' now all gone SOUTH! *Sigh*!
Mind you at first i did think!...cough cough! that perhaps I might be pregnant! LOL! HA! (as if) I have not had my monthly for a few months now! and I was getting a bit of heartburn....and then I felt a bit of movement in my belly! and I started thinking OMG! what if! could I be!....and then I remembered, that i was a greedy old cow and that I was probably suffering from heartburn and WIND due to the fact that I had been a FAT PIG over Easter and devoured a whole box of LINDT LINDORS to myself BURP! Pardon Me! :D
Not to mention the fact that I am now having to wear my 'Olive' from 'On the Buses' Bi-focals now nearly all the time! (Rosie said they looked good on me in the opticians! we have laughed about that day, ever since and every time I put them on! lil' ratbag!) Will life get any better than this! lol!
Sorry to ramble on!
HERE'S WISHING YOU A HAPPY WEEKEND
(PICTURES - are of my crafting over the last few weeks)
Heart It 
Oh my...you have had a time. You need some sunshine and a treat!
ReplyDeleteI would sugest you be honest with your mom and tell her that what she says is hurtful BUT after reading your whole post I dare say she already knows that and continues anyway.
Keep surrounding yourself with people who love and adore you and that will lift you up.
I read a bumper sticker years ago and it's always been my favorite:
"if it's not one thing it's you Mother!"
that could have been me writing that about my mum....she sadly never made me happy, she thought i was weak because im quiet and dont rant and complain about things. but before she died 2 years ago, we made our peace and i do miss her.....not the arguments and comments though. keep on trying to be the better person.i know its hard x
ReplyDeleteI send you a little bit sunshine!!
ReplyDeleteHave a nice weekend,
hugs,
Barbara
Oh My! It has been that way this winter here too...just something about the grey for so long - just totally demotivates me too. This was a very hard winter for me for some reason but now that we have had some decent temperatures and SUN it is getting better! Isn't the menopause thing a blessing and a curse?! LONG for the day when we don't have to deal with that time of the month and then cruelly get slapped with all the other crazy hormonal stuff! This is why I say men are whimps! We have to deal with so much physical issues as women/ mothers! As for mums...well I have learned a technique called "When to send someone to the MOON...so they can't get in your little comfy house of a soul" I just have to breathe and find that way to send that person on their rocket out of my space! Hope you continue to feel better!
ReplyDeletehugs -Pam
Hey Happy, Just remember lack of sunshine really sets me in a spin... so that being the case for you it's making everything 100x harder to handle. I do understand about your relation with your Mom I too have been having a hard time with my Mom. She has changed or maybe not at all but maybe I am seeing through her now... it is hard to pick up the phone and give her a call,I always have to think before I speak.... you know what I am going to wish for you a "Beautiful Sunshine Day" oxox, Diane
ReplyDeleteHello Happy, I really felt for you reading this. Luckily I have a lovely relationship with my Mother, and like you, lost my Father 30 years ago. LOL with the menopause stuff, and I have just read it aloud to my husband! We are now promised Spring weather, so the sun in the sky and flowers in the garden should lift everyone's spirits, and your lovely family will keep you buoyant. Embrace the glasses-I am sure with your individuality you will make them rock! Lots of love, Geraldine
ReplyDeleteHugs to you. I hope your days get better quickly.
ReplyDeleteerika
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ReplyDeleteSounds like you're being a bit hard on yourself....you have a lot going on....the hormones alone are enough! Parents are a funny thing. Seems like we spend our whole lives waiting for approval from them when we really should be giving it to ourselves! Remember: the sun will come out tomorrow! :)
ReplyDeleteOh Happy, You are just like the rest of us. My mother was similar to yours. I always think it is their generation that they didn't have what they needed while growing up and kind of resent our generation.
ReplyDeleteI know it is true for me and I suspect for you, too, it made us better mothers. Unlike my mother, I have never told any of my children they are ugly. My mother didn't want to me to have a Big head so she never told me I was smart.
No matter she lived with me the last years of her life. It was rough, but through it all I knew I would treasure our time together.
And I do.
Better my mother passed, she told me how much she liked me. You have to love your kids but she liked me. I hold on to that.
Ask yourself, why did that relation share the nasty message with you? I keep all kinds of stuff to myself because I don't want to cause hurt.
You are wonderful and perfect just the way you are. Your feelings are not good or bad..just feelings.
Keep up the good work. Kiss Kiss.
e
P.S. Thank you for sharing.
My Mother was that way too Happy..so are my two sisters..nice to your face nasty behind your back..it is so very hurtful..You are a wonderful lady..you cheer me up with your posts..I wish I could do the same for you sweetie..As for the menopause thing..it is just something that we have to deal with as women..I know how miserable it makes you feel at times..If you want to share your bad times with us you have my blessings..No one expects you to be "Happy Happy" all of the time as we are ourselves are not that way..Hugs to you dear lady..
ReplyDeleteIt's not silly of you to share and I am so glad you have. I also have a very difficult mother and I'm really struggling to cope with it. Unfortunately I still live at home and imagine/hope things will improve massively when that changes. I've tried the calm confrontation, the angry confrontation and ignoring it altogether and nothing seems to work. I'm at the age (22) when most things in life are starting to working themselves out but this terrible relationship always puts an awful dampener on everything.
ReplyDeleteHow do you deal with it?
Hang in there! I'm sure your feeling better all ready! Marlynne
ReplyDeleteSorry, but Shit Loves Rosie really doesn't have the same ring about it!
ReplyDeleteZ xx
smile..breathe..go to your ''Happy'' place...and let it go! And like the other lady said..question the mind of the person who shared the nastiness..not nice :( Ho Hum! :) xxx
ReplyDeleteFamilies...we all have problems with our families one way or another so you are not alone xxx Stay Happy though as we need you xxxx
ReplyDeleteAww Happs, sounds like you're having a bit of a pants time at the mo.Dont like the sound of the 'pause so I hope it comes and goes quickly for you.
ReplyDeleteAnd you are not alone on the mother thing at all. I rarely mention my oldies on my blog, I see them once a year and even then they can make me feel rubbish.I honestly dont think Oldies realise what hurtful things they are actually saying sometimes! I'm quite envious of friends who have that lovely mother-daughter thing going as I know that will never ever be me.
As for the weather well, I'm totally with you on how crap it makes you feel when its grey-grey-grey outside.
Chin up my lovely xx
ps I can top trump you with the Lindor..whole tin of Quality street..uh-hum
...my amazing mother-in-love told me recently that when others treat us like that, all we can do is put up a boundary..and clean up on our side of the fence..I am learning how to do that..I think sometimes mothers forget we are grown women, not little girls in need of constant pestering..all we can do is learn, and strive not to do it to our girls..vitamin D3 helps incredibly if you don't get enough sun..many blessings..you are wonderful!!
ReplyDeleteI just discovered your blog and I love to hear your rambling....as it makes me feel normal.....I have a very negative sis who I love to be with , but after the hours pass I am ready to be alone again. I HAVE in my older age figured something out....that those people would be that way even if you weren't around....that it isn't about how awful or whatever you are but that they are negative thinkers .... probably coming from childhood disappointments....they get into the habit of thinking that way for life which is disappointing! So sad they can't see themselves to try and change it for the benefit of others to get to enjoy their company, but it is their choice and we are only the brunt of their negativity. So it isn't you, really, it is HER. I LOVE YOUR BLOG and so hope by this time you have had some sunshine. Love your creativity!!! So love your choice of printing and colors and HAPPY subject matter....I just realized your creativity matches your name!!! It is HAPPY...stay that way and give your Mother the gift of your happiness inspite of her emotional neglect. Sounds like she really needs something positive and you may be the only thing positive she has.
ReplyDelete